Someone said to me today, “I’m trying to get rid of the negativity.” (Never mind the context — it’s a brilliant idea and noble endeavor in any case.) Not always possible – sometimes we have to go through the negativity and simply arrive on the other side of it. In that case, the quote above is easier said than done. Full of noble intention, it could be empty intention without substance. That’s where you come in. Substantial intentions make for real results. Learning to be honest with your feelings, observing them like watching a movie and not getting attached, letting them go, will put you on the path toward living each moment with love, grace and gratitude.
When I was about 10-years old, I was sitting with school mates at recess. Too young to understand why they were uncomfortable, I was hurt when one burst out, “WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS SAYING THANK YOU?” Natural gratitude is often seen as fake because we may not believe its intention. From a young age (due to being conditioned by those around me who did not believe in a naturally positive nature and also being too immature to just be myself), I preferred to be suspicious of people’s motives and over analyze. This Sherlock Holmes mechanism has gained me some ground when it comes to not being taken advantage of, but when everything is suspect we are letting externals get in the way.
I’ll share now a picture of my Papa and our dog, Toby at the Farm in Leroy. When I left home it was hard for Papa because he had raised me with Nana. Leaving home is never easy (you know that “Big Fat Greek Wedding” where the dad thinks his 30 something daughter is ‘running away from home’ for moving out) yeah it was like that. I remember saying to a friend, “I hope my Papa can find something to be happy.” He looks so happy in this picture, I hope he is living life with gratitude. The other day I heard a saying that always wanting more is the opposite of gratitude, being satisfied with what one has is the highest form of thanks. It comes from a vast nature that exists within us. Seeing how hard it was for my Papa to let go when I moved to first S. Korea then England, and overcoming societies doubts of a grateful and happy nature, have helped me to look inward rather than outward.
It isn’t possible to do so every minute. Although in the previous post below this you’ll see some young boys doing yoga and the kind of laser like focus it takes to get in that zone is a kind of grace all its own. You don’t travel to happy, you don’t earn it, or find it, you exist as it is and you deserve it.